If you want a child to listen to you, you have to listen to her ideas as well. Stand up for children when they are being mistreated or bullied. That action will really make an impact in their psyche. It tells them that they are worthy. Believe them when they tell you something. Don’t dismiss a child that tells you something that an adult did or is doing to them. Don’t call them liars. Just because an adult said something about them or told you that the child did something. Don’t believe the adult over your child without getting the child’s side of the story. Also in that situation, don’t put the child on the spot where they appear to challenge the adult. Take them to a safe place or a little away from the confrontation and ask them, without judgment, and so they will not have any fear of retribution.
Have respect for their ideas. Just because you think a certain way, doesn’t mean that the child thinks exactly like you. Give them a chance to have their own ideas, and let them tell you what is important to them or how they feel.
Access to wisdom: At an early age children can learn to trust themselves if they are taught to trust themselves. If you speak with children and reflect back to them what is going on, I know that they can access their own feelings, and their own wisdom. An easy question to reflect back to them might be “How do you feel?” “Does it feel nice inside your belly or your chest?” Does it make you feel happy when you think about this? Help them to begin to trust their feeling and their instincts. They will know that you can be trusted and that you can also trust them, and they can trust themselves. Children need time to process and understand what is going on around them. But they need your confidence in them to begin to evaluate things for themselves. Let know that it is okay for them to have their own opinions and that they can find the answer inside of themselves too.
Accessing inner wisdom is also something that is taught by example. They follow your behaviors of trusting yourself too. They will also emulate your behaviors of dealing with stress, and your take on life. If you are bad-mouthing every person and every situation, children will pick up on this as well. If your built in belief system tells you that everyone is out to get you and people are predominately bad, children will get that with every fiber of their being. So be careful of what it is that you are transmitting to your children.
Balance: is very important for children and teenagers. You need to show them how to balance priorities, and their playtime. Take the time to show them how to do things well and why? Lead with examples of your own life. Balance your own time with them. Balance your work and off time. Encourage them to rest and take needed breaks sometimes. You do the same. If you teach children with love they will respond with tremendous love, affection, attention, and honor. Call them honorable too.
These little adults in the making will grow according to how you nurture and care for them. So start having a relationship now with them and watch them develop into loving beings. copyright 2006 Yoga Kat
Yoga Kat teaches children’s yoga ages 3-6, 7-12yrs and Adults in NJ. The Author of the book DAUGHTER BELOVED and created a children’s affirmation CD and an adult affirmation CD. Available for speaking and reached at yogakat@verizondotnet or 201 970-9340–COMING SOON -thecircleofpeacedotcom